About this blog

I am terrible at using chopsticks, no matter who shows me, and no matter how hard I try. I was born left-handed but the nuns beat me until I learned to write with my right hand, and anything requiring a lot of dexterity remains a challenge. Maybe months and months of living in Taiwan will help me get it... or I will lose lots of weight and probably will accidentally leave behind a few forks. It's all good.

Friday, September 3, 2010

A fork in the road?

I'm trying to decide if I care that people will probably think less of me if I cave in to being a stupid American while in Taiwan. How would I do that? Well, I would bring my own fork to meals.


Chopsticks continue to REALLY challenge me. I'm almost too embarrassed to try using them when I'm by myself, and when I'm with others, I might as well be trying to parallel-park a full 6-passenger SUV judging by the insane pressure I feel.


I'm going to be:

  • learning a new corporate culture
  • meeting my direct team of 14 people and trying to remember everyone's names and roles
  • meeting probably dozens of engineers
  • meeting the CEO and other C-level executives
  • learning tons of new software and business processes
  • 6100 miles from my husband and children for a month
  • living in a place where I know nobody except the eight co-workers I met for a few hours last month, all of whom I will very likely see only at work
  • living in a place where I don't speak the language of the staff
  • without organized activity of any kind after work hours unless I stay late at the office (45 minutes from home) to work out in the gym... I'm usually good for a week before I'm ready to die from boredom and loneliness... 
  • challenged continually by cuisine I don't recognize and might be allergic to components of, with no way to check beforehand (and therefore, will have to stick to clearly "safe" choices)
  • trying to learn enough Mandarin to not be incredibly rude
  • living in a climate that's much warmer and more humid than what I'm used to

I don't even know if there's English-language channels on the television in the suites... I didn't turn it on when I was there in August.

So, while I'm NOT feeling sorry for myself (even if it sounds that way), I am thinking that the challenges are sufficient without messing with EVERY aspect of the most basic human act: eating. I feel a little defensive about it, but if I'm going to have to eat food I don't recognize, can I at least catch the break of using a familiar utensil?

I am going to make plenty of dumb-American blunders anyway. I'm blonde, and I will naturally stick out a bit even if I do everything "right". If, after a month of "damn it, I forgot my fork" struggles with chopsticks, I accidentally have the breakthrough of coordination that will let me actually get measurable quantities of food to my mouth using these devices, huzzah! If it doesn't happen, oh well.

Feel free to blast me. I'm ready. But I think I've decided. Maybe after I work through all the homesickness and missing my toddler and feeling anxious about my tween and integrating in every way with a dynamic and demanding new team doing tons of unfamiliar work with products I have to learn all about (probably 12 hours a day) *breathe* without becoming an alcoholic or a weepy, dysfunctional mess, then on the next trip, I will address the issue of locally-appropriate eating utensils. Until then, I think a fork wrapped in a handkerchief will be in my purse at all times.

UTENSIL(s): None

2 comments:

  1. Recommendation : Hit up REI, and grab some heavy-duty plastic utensils. They make some phenomenal sporks and "all-in-one" kits perfect for travel.

    Just remember to put them in your checked baggage, since I suspect you cannot take them carry-on in the US.

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  2. I'm so glad I found your blog! Bringing a fork sounds like a great solution to me. Anything you need to prove about being adaptable and open minded you are already proving. But get a beautiful fork. In fact, get an assortment of them. I know you are already there now but if there is anything like an expat second-hand store where you can get individual forks, that would be great. Maybe even a pretty case to carry it in. When you are stateside again, let's go to the antique stores and find beautiful forks.

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